So…. I leave in 9 hours and I’m still not packed. Everything’s there… I promise! It just hasn’t hit me yet… that I’m leaving on a trip of a lifetime. This trip has been on my “bucket list” since forever… and the only response I can muster up when people ask me if I’m excited is… wide eyes and a mouth halfway to a smile, and halfway ready to say something… but nothing comes out because I have no words.

There are so many thoughts running through my head, it’s hard to catch one… they’re fast and I’m out of shape. But one that has allowed more contemplation is the memory of leaving for YWAM in 2007. It’s weird to think this was 3 years ago because it still feels so fresh. But remembering who I was and the significance of that particular adventure opens my heart to the wonderfully different realization of who I am now, and the significance of this new adventure I’m embarking on tonight.

Last time, I was making the decision to leave my Junior year of college–everything I knew and thought I wanted. Last time, I took a gigantic leap of faith, trusting that a small hobby of mine would develop enough for me to call myself a mission photographer by the end of it. Last time changed who I am today. It’s about a 7 hour long story… so I won’t go into it now…. but the important thing is I’m a completely different person than I was when I boarded my nonstop flight to Germany in 2007.

This time is different. This time feels like a dream…. one that I never dared to have in 2007. I never thought that hobby would develop into a passion, that would develop into another leap of faith, that would develop into my job. I never thought I would have the privilege of doing what I love as my JOB…. and I never thought I would have the opportunity to combine it with traveling. The best of both worlds have become friends and tonight I’m embarking on the first leg of this new adventure.

You guys….. I’m seriously so excited. I sincerely hope you’ll join me on this new adventure… and I hope something about this trip inspires you to dream big.

Our life-changing journey begins this evening as we board our overnight flight to Cairo, Egypt.

Here’s some shots from my last adventure that bring back many memories of some largely defining moments…

Sitting on a bench overlooking all of Herrnhut and Ruppersdorf, Germany…. the birth place of The Order of the Mustard Seed.

Some shots taken one of the first days I went exploring in Herrnhut. I was unsure, nervous, but excited all at the same time!

See you in Cairo!

Today I’d like to share something I wrote in May of 2008. It’s something I wrote at the start of a project I was working on in the wake of my adventures in YWAM…. a book of compiled pictures, thoughts, and prayers. The project is still in JUST the starting phase because I set it on the back burner when I began building my business that summer…. but it still tugs on my heart everyday and I wanted to share it with you.

“Yada’—to know by experience. The Hebrews used this word to describe how a man knows his wife after they consummate their marriage vows on their wedding night. Intimate. Exposed. And this kind of knowledge is only gained through experience; no amount of hypothesizing or imagination can substitute. I think out of all the many characters in the Bible, more specifically the Old Testament, Moses was the one person who had something even remotely like this kind of knowledge when it came to his relationship with God. Exodus 33 tells us “As he went into the tent, the pillar of cloud would come down and hover at its entrance while the Lord spoke with Moses. When the people saw the cloud standing at the entrance of the tent, they would stand and bow down in front of their own tents. Inside the Tent of Meeting, the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as one speaks to a friend (Ex. 33: 9-11)”. I want that. How amazing would that be to have such a relationship with God…face…to…face. I wouldn’t have to feel like these heroes of faith in the bible were products of then, and I, here in the modern context of things, am somehow too different and too insignificant to house the capacity to have such a knowledge of what God can be like. Just because Moses and David were one in a million, doesn’t mean I can’t be. Who knows…maybe they’re the only ones who had courage enough to entertain the thought that they were wired for something bigger than themselves and that this God of their ancestors was actually more real than they could comprehend.

I am, by no means, a Moses or a David. I am not even close. But I refuse to think that just because I live in America in California in Orange County in Irvine in a two story house with a car and a family and a pool that I can’t be a Moses or a David. I reject the notion that I can’t hear His voice because there are so many other things vying for my attention. I reject the notion that I can’t move with the Holy Spirit because only holy people like Pastors and monks know how to do that. And I reject the idea that I can’t be used in such a way, that centuries from now, people will refer to me as a woman who met face to face with the living God. In the name of Jesus Christ.

I recently read these words: “we all believe in God’s power to change the world through others; we just struggle to believe in His power to do it through us” (Pete Grieg, The Vow). So true. I think it’s a difficult thing to wrap our minds around because we grow up reading these amazing Bible stories about how God parts the Red sea and Jesus raises from the dead and the apostles performed miracles, and yet we don’t put two and two together that it was reality. We can learn the theology of what we believe, we can study the life and teachings of Jesus, and we can read all the books we want on the subject, but there’s something to be said about the phrase “you’d have to be there.” I do have to be there, or at least, I prefer to be there.

So, This is my journey, of sorts, learning from being “there”….and “here”, that I can be used to change the world…and from these lessons, experiencing Yada’.”

The reason I’m sharing this with you is because I’m about to embark on a seriously AWESOME trip…. following the footsteps of my man Moses. On March 9th, I will be flying out of Los Angeles with a group of 50 people from Horizon Christian Fellowship, and we’ll touch down in the place where it all started… Cairo, Egypt. From there we’ll be visiting pyramids, the sphinx,  St. Catherine’s Monastery (the place rumored to have been the site of the burning bush), The Red Sea, Petra, and through the ancient land of Moab to Mt. Nebo. We’ll also be spending the 2nd part of the trip tracing the footsteps of Jesus in his last days. We’ll be visiting the Mount of Olives, Garden of Gesthemane, the house of Caiaphas, the wailing wall and the rabbinical tunnels. And the last part of our adventure will take us to Bethlehem, then the Garden Tomb, and a few other historical sites.

I find it amazingly curious how this whole trip has been orchestrated… I’m in awe of this opportunity that’s been presented… and I’m STOKED to have this chance to use what God’s given me to experience such an amazing part of the world!

This isn’t just a trip I’m going on. I want you to come with me! My job on this trip is to be the photojournalist, documenting what I see and feel and the places we experience. It’s also to keep a blog as we go so you can experience these amazing places with us! Make sure to check back here as we take off on March 9th…  and experience the Middle East in the Footsteps of this man who knew the living God… face to face.

My hope is that this trip will bolster our faith and change the way we read the scriptures…. that we might draw closer to the heart of the living God and experience Yada’.

(Warning: Before I was a photographer, I was a Pre-Medical student majoring in Biology. I loved every second of it and yes, I’m a geek in real life. If science freaks you out, don’t read this post.)

The Oxford American Dictionary states that Entropy is: “A thermodynamic quantity representing the unavailability of a system’s thermal energy for conversion into mechanical work, often interpreted as the degree of disorder or randomness of the system. Also defined as a lack of order or predictability.” In other words…. Entropy = Change.

Something that never fails to freak me out a little bit is the concept of change. Not only is change constant, but it’s something that, if you allow it to happen, can overwhelm and inhibit your life. You’d think that we’d figure it out and adapt since it’s a constant. I guess some people are better at adapting to change than others.

Interesting fact though… Entropy = Fire. The heat lost in fire dissipates and therefore cannot be retrieved or put back into a compact object for further use. I think it’s funny how, of all the outdoor activities, the place all the worries and stresses dissipate most is around the campfire. As I sit around the epitome of change with friends, talking about how much change trips me up in life and recounting all the good times that have since changed, I stare into the fire (change) and it mesmerizes me… it calms me… and all my cares seem to burn up in the dancing flames. (Hopefully you followed that…)

There you have it… I love hate change. I love it because it gives me the chance to become who I want to be. I hate it because change FORCES action whether I’m ready for it or not. So this Thanksgiving season (post-Thanksgiving season) I’m thankful for Entropy… on more than one level. I’m thankful that change has happened this year and I’ve grown so much because of it. The beginning of this year started me off with a bang… I was drop-kicked into being self-employed when the coffee shop I worked at closed for economic reasons. Things changed. My business has changed so much since I first started in August 2008… and I’ve had more opportunities this year than I had ever dreamed. Things changed. I am not who I was last November. Things changed.

I hope this holiday season, you have the chance to take inventory of all the entropy you’ve encountered this year. Remember who you were last November… what your biggest worry was… who the most important person in your life was and why… what your dreams were… and compare it to where you are now. Did your biggest worry get resolved? Who was the most important person in your life and are they still? What changed? What were your dreams last year? Did you take action to make those dreams come true or did you push them off as “unattainable” and let them fade away? What made you choose what you did? And… how can you learn from the change that occurred last year? Are you going to let another whole year pass without pursuing your dreams? I would hope not…. because I’m definitely not going to let that happen in my own life. This year has been HUGE… and I only anticipate that 2010 will only make life even more crazy awesome.

Lastly, for your enjoyment, and since I’ve come to realize a blog post is waaay better with pictures, a little family mini shoot for you: Meet The Urbina family… Jamie and Rachel, and their ridiculously awesome son Wesly.

It was barely light outside as one eye opened to find my alarm. As my brain came to life after, what felt like, a short sleep… I remembered…. Today’s the day. Lance and Laurie are getting married today!!! From there, a flood of jitters and butterflies fell into my chest and the coffee I was sipping at the breakfast table only made them flap their wings faster. “Today’s the day my girl marries the love of her life.” “Today’s the day Lance has been waiting his whole life for.” I felt the beautiful tension of their love story burst through my nerves… and a flow of excitement and pure joy filled my heart. As I pulled into the driveway… I said a quick prayer, “This is your day God… can’t wait to see you move!”

Quick steps and a “Come on in!” placed me in the living room of the Kohlenberg house staring at this beauty….

Laurie’s a ridiculously beautiful girl even on a bad day… THIS day, however, there was an extra glow that made her absolutely stunning! I had to fight back tears because I was so proud/in awe/excited/nostalgic.

While I spent the morning with Laurie and the girls, Christopher hung out with Lance and the boys. Apparently it was quite the silent and peaceful morning for them… they went about their business and got ready for the big day…. Lance just couldn’t wait to see his bride!

Just look at this guy! I couldn’t help but think about how just grateful he was for this day and for his bride… there was nothing but happiness in his eyes all day.

This was one of my absolute favorite moments of the day. They wanted to be with each other SO BAD. I love how this shot just shows the excitement and anticipation Laurie had for when Lance saw her for the first time. This isn’t just a moment people… this is a moment we, as women, dream of our whole lives…. what our future husband’s reaction will be when he first sees us on our wedding day. It’s a day when we look and feel our best… a day we’ll remember the rest of our lives. And Laurie was GORGEOUS!

The day went without a hitch… and the love and support I felt from all angles definitely left me feeling full and inspired. Something that struck me during the ceremony was how the central importance of their entire event was God. Lance and Laurie’s life and love story is such a stark pointer to the gut-wrenchingly powerful love of their Savior. He is present and active. He is Good. He loves us.

I owe a big thank you to a few people who made my life easier, more beautiful, and basically fantastic! First of all, Laurie and Lance, you are clients to covet and irreplaceable friends… I’m completely humbled and honored that you think so highly of me and your support has been so encouraging! Thank you! Bob Botsford of Horizon Christian Fellowship–you ROCK! Also, Diane of Whimsey Florals was the genius behind all the beautiful flowers. I was IN LOVE with the bouquets she did and would recommend that EVERYONE use her! Lastly, I had two amazing shooters with me… first, Christopher outdid himself this wedding! Not only did he get quite a few Ah-Mazing shots, but I couldn’t have done everything I did without him. Mucho Thanks also go to Amanda Patrice, who battled traffic and a super early morning to come all the way down to San Diego to shoot with me! I had so much fun with you and basically… you’re amazing.

And now, without further adieu… the slideshow.

Click Here to View the Slideshow!!!